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May smile

A dying man gathered his lawyer, doctor and clergyman at his bed side and handed each of them an envelope containing $25,000 in cash. He made them each promise that after his death and during his repose, they would place the three envelopes in his coffin. He told them that he wanted to have enough money to enjoy the next life.A week later the man died. At the Wake, the Lawyer and Doctor and Clergyman, each concealed an envelope in the coffin and bid their old client and friend farewell.By chance, these three met several months later. Soon the Clergyman, feeling guilty, blurted out a confession saying that there was only $10,000 in the envelope he placed in the coffin. He felt, rather than waste all the money, he would send it to a Mission in South America. He asked for their forgiveness.The Doctor, moved by the gentle Clergyman's sincerity, confessed that he too had kept some of the money for a worthy medical charity. The envelope, he admitted, had only $8000 in it. He said, he too could not bring himself to waste the money so frivolously when it could be used to benefit others.By this time the Lawyer was seething with self-righteous outrage. He expressed his deep disappointment in the felonious behavior of two of his oldest and most trusted friends. "I am the only one who kept his promise to our dying friend. I want you both to know that the envelope I placed in the coffin contained the full amount. Indeed, my envelope contained my personal check for the entire $25,000."

Graham Weeks ● 3107d6 Comments

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2gABYTmXoshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2gABYTmXos

Graham Weeks ● 3087d

This format used I think to be popular in the Observer some years ago but talking to a friend about another friend I came up with this.I am a non-conformistYou are eccentricShe is odd.

Graham Weeks ● 3092d

Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet.Yorkshireman: "Ayup, lad, I need to talk to thee about me cat."Vet: "Is it a tom ?"Yorkshireman: "Nay, I've browt it wi' us."

Graham Weeks ● 3093d

The chap in the cap looks like a young Tony Hancock.

Keith Iddon ● 3097d

Its easy to see that Joy Inboden Damschroder Morrissey fits right into Ealing with its large media community and strong film and theatre ties with her background in the film industry.Interestingly, there was Joy Damschroeder (It is probably a completely different Joy Damschroder, but it made me laugh!) who was the 2004 Acting Fellow at the Contemporary American Theatre Company (CATCO) based in Columbis, Ohio, USA. In its production of  Chekhov's Uncle Vanya a review by the Columbus Dispatch wrote: “Joy Damschroder, this season's acting fellow at CATCO, conveys innocence as Sonya, the dutiful daughter who longs for Dr. Astrov (Jonathan Putnam), who only has eyes for lovely Elena Andreyevna (Robin Amy Gordon), unhappy in a loveless marriage to a retired professor (Jon Farris).” Could this be the same Joy Damschroeder?Later in the season Joy Damschroder stars as Louise in a CATCO production of Comedian Steve Martin’s adaptation of a 1910 German farce, The Underpants, had a successful Off-Broadway run a couple of years ago. Now, Contemporary American Theatre Company (CATCO) will perform its own version of Martin’s adaptation November 26 through December 19 at Studio One in the Riffe Center. Jonathan Putnam directs the romp, which begins one Sunday morning when husband and wife, Louise and Theo, stop to watch a parade. Louise’s underwear accidentally, and scandalously, falls to the ground. Her mortified husband imagines the worst type of social and financial disasters befalling him as a result of the errant underwear – yet, he remains blind to the fact that the men who suddenly materialize as prospective lodgers for their room to let are there precisely because of his wife’s underpants. (Short North Gazette, News of the Short North, Surrounding Neighbourhoods, and the Columbus Art Community http://www.shortnorth.com/Theatre2004.html). Here is where the MAY SMILE comes into it, there is a picture of  “Jon Marballi (back) and Tod Zimmerman grab a peek as Louise (Joy Damschroder) accidentally drops her pants in The Underpants. Photo/ Dave Alkire”
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It is probably a completely different Joy Damschroder, but it made me laugh!

John Alan Peters ● 3098d

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect.One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple was driving their perfect car along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help.There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys.Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple; and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.Question: Who was the survivor?Answer:The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.**** Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.**** Men keep scrolling.So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must have been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.By the way, if you're a woman and you're still reading, this illustrates another point: Women never listen.!!

Graham Weeks ● 3098d